I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Randomize
