you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
