i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Randomize
