My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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