What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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