hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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