I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
