I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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