So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
