Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize