remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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