I want to have your abortion
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
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