I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
this boner is exhausting
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I wear drunk well.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
