no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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