I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
