I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Randomize
