Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
