loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Randomize
