I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
