What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Randomize
