I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
