I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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