Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
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