it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
