In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Randomize
