Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
