we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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