You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
