she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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