You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
