He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
