Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
