and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
