you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Randomize
