The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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