I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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