If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Randomize
