I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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