I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Randomize
