Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
