none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Another day, another engagement, another cat
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Randomize