the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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