My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Randomize
