I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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