One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
