I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
