Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
