If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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