why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
