you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
