I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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