i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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